Kyle

“Maurice had a reading and talked with Renee a great deal. He came over and told me about it, and while we were lying together, I reached down and took hold of his necklace (crematory disk) and laid it over his heart, laying my hand over that. I silently asked Renee to come and let me see her. I didn’t really feel it would happen at that point, but I just lovingly “thought” it.

When we went to bed, we were having very intense sex, pushing boundaries. I was a bit high/drunk and during our lovemaking, Renee just came to me, she was there, and I could feel her as intensely as I felt Dagmar that night. I felt her around me, then she put her hands on either side of my neck and we kissed. I was telling Maurice what was happening, and now I don’t remember most of what I said. I am only sure of the feeling. She also at one point was nudging/pushing me in a playful way, the message felt like, “Yes, I am here, this is real, go on, keep going, I am here with you and part of this.” I laughed a lot because it was so intense and so REAL. She was there and I could see her clearly. She was wearing a pale color, maybe light grey or cream. Hair down. I also felt when she left. Again, it was just an intense knowing. Maurice said at one point I told him she was merging with me and I remember that. She was there, then she was in me, with me, then out again. It was euphoric and amazing and again – intense.”

Maurice

In the bathroom you saw her first. You were crying at first did not want to move if only because of the intensity of the feeling and that it was really rattling your cage. At first you did not tell me what was going on. I had brought you in there as you had to pee.  I waited. At some point you began to cry and go into a trance at the same time. I didn’t know what was happening. I knelt in front of you and waited. After a bit you told me that she was here.

After 5 minutes I brought you back into the room

You began to soften into it. Some of the things you told me……

She was here to merge with you and she did.

When I was lying beside you you said that she was in between us.

When I was rubbing the skin on your leg, her hand was doing so also. As if hers and my hands were one.

That she was playfully aggressive in telling and showing you that this was real.

She wanted to be there, be with us. I asked you to ask her what she wanted to see sexually. You laughed and said she wanted to see me take you from behind.

I asked you questions as you were trying to figure out why now when I am drunk and stoned and not when I am not. Is this real?

Does this feel good? Yes!
Does it feel warm? Yes!
Do you feel my body? Yes!
Is it ok to be here? Yes!
Am I real? Yes!
Do you feel safe? Yes

Everything asked had a positive and supportive reply

I would talk to you. You began to cry when you told me the feeling was so wonderful that you wanted to come back here and was fearful that you couldn’t. I asked you to ask Renee if it was ok to come back. She said yes. I asked her to let her know it was ok for her to enter our bodies as we are making love. You did so. I asked you to ask her if she would come back. She said she would.

Very early on you said she had left. I began asking her to return and stay with us. In about 5-10 seconds you said she was back without any prompting. I kept telling you to ask her questions and to speak up. Keep the channel. The more playful she became the more you laughed.

“If you want to find an angel you’ll find it where it fell.”

B.B.B – Baby Be Blatant

Talking with therapist I am seeing about “energy events.”  I’ve had a cluster in the last week.

I’ve always seen these events as energy movement/frequency change being “capped”/”pinched” off.

Today my descriptive terms were “pinch” and “spigot.”  I talked about the “spigot” people.  Those who try to shove us into pipes and boxes, label us.  Injunctions laid in by parents.  Collectives and ideologies desiring that we go long with them.  When at heart we are open and whole.

Turning on and off the spigot examples “there’s not enough to go around.”  Specificity is similar.  Job requirement/ labels to push us into the pipe.  If you’re an expert the more power you have.  And the more lumbering you become.  We feel pressured to do so.  It’s how we “earn a living”  This is what is required.  What we went to school to do. We have many interests when we are young.  We see that “the way to go” is to begin to channel these interests into the “pipe of degrees.”  In doing this we begin to go against our truth, nature, intuition and gut feelings.  Something in us chafes.  In the spigot world fighting this is fruitless.  And when we fight this we then go to “experts” to become “experts”

The antidote is to be “everything,” open and flexible.  In war language this is guerrilla warfare.  Fast, smart and mobile.  The spigot people don’t like it when you are “everything.”  Bucky Fuller was hard to pinpoint.  That’s how he wanted it.  He never fit into any pipe yet he was versed in and recognized for whatever that pipe-dwellers held to be their own.  Generalists/Comprehensivists piss people off.  His line to people later in his life who would question who he was would be…..

“I am an average human being!”

You are “everything”!  You are many.  Rather then be a “project manager” at your work, you are a project manager for Universe.  It shows in your desires, your insightfulness, your ongoing watch for discoveries, interests, and coolness, your nerd/geek fantastic-ness.

You’ve got your work resume down. Write a street resume.  Stuff like you being a data-junkie, deepest you’ve ever been in debt, ability to amass parking tickets, trombone solos, band performances, recipe expertise, poems, fan-dom, bankruptcies, jobs you held as a teenager, times arrested and for what, obsessions, planets you want to visit, shooting star wishes. More! More! More!

If one cooks for show one gets little from the meal.  If one cooks for pleasure one gains ten fold.

At that moment, Renee was around : )

2) Today at Hollywood Farmer’s Market….In me selling yogurt I am consciously trafficking immortality!

Haven’t had a dream with Marshall in a long time..

I have been walking through the dream/environment. It is now near the end of the dream. Everything looks “normal.” Then I see that people manifested this “gravity” and “air pressure” and how this manifestation begins to break down and fall apart. The atmosphere/air pressure/gravity changes. I see these spherical green plants begin to implode/be sucked inward into itself. The same is happening with people. Things begin to float as they should be. I see large tennis courts enclosed by nets where people can play inside/on top and are doing so. I see other examples of this shift

The keys -

- Gravity/Air pressure manifested
- When manifestation loosens, manifesting agents implode/collapse
- Things are allowed to be as they are – light

“I will miss him, but I won’t abandon him to mortality. I will think of him as existing within the animating life that insures existence. I will think of him and his family with that gentle regard in spite of all the contrary appearances on the mortal plane. David’s spirit and soul live well in my heart, among all the lovely people, who remember with me the good times, and the healing times, that were created for so many, including us. I have fond memories. I wish him safe travels.”

Some of us choose to return if only for the fact that we “like the show!”

More importantly, it’s the opportunity to love that makes it matter.